Zombie Bambi

Hey Lustlings,

Another week, another casualty of Martha Trust. This fellow was my Valentines gift, so I don't know how little he cost, I just know that he's feeling a little worse for wear...

He seems mostly Bambi shaped, except for the crest on his head?! The eyes have drooped and his fur is a bit crusty, somewhat as though he's been rescued from a house fire incident. Does this sort of thing happen in every charity shop, or just Martha Trust? Why is every item on sale so terribly abused? It is possible though that that he's a special edition Zombie Bambi. Don't you all remember that scene from the Movie?

Much Lust! - Team Martha

We know an old lady who swallowed a fly...

We've been sitting on this Martha Trust marvel for a while. This beautiful old lady is certainly hand sewn and one of a kind...

She's amazing enough just as she is, with her wiry legs, hunched position and terrifying nose... Is it just me, or does she bear a remarkable resemblance to that evil puppet in the Saw movies?

I was pretty excited as it was, but wait, what's this????!

What horrors lie in her belly? What on earth is that tangle of legs spewing forth from her oversized mouth?

Suddenly it becomes clear! It's the old Lady who swallowed a fly, and all of the other things she swallowed to catch the spider that caught the fly and so on... This is perhaps the scariest Nursery prop ever created, words can't describe the shivering sensation you get from stuffing a cow down her throat. Speaking of which something is wrong with that cow. Did you ever see one looking like this?

Until next time, Much Lust - Team Martha

The Nut Bunny

Happy Valentines Day Martha!

Today we bring you this beautifully hand crafted Rabbit, fresh off the 50p shelves.

Yeah, that's right. He's made of nut shells... and is adopting some sort of Karate pose I think. He'd not only caught my eye, but also that of the lady at the register, who wrapped him up fondly for me, commenting on what a darling he is.

Almost certainly created by an obsessive compulsive with a nut addiction, or an exceptionally gifted squirrel, you decide. Often forgotten by us in these entries, are Martha's mysterious donators, the proud creators of these fine and wonderous objects. The donators whose lives and stories can only be pieced together through the detritus that they leave for Martha in those black bin bags. Who knows what combination of aeronauts, sex addicts, kleptomaniacs, vampires, old eccentrics, lonely geniuses, rodents, train spotters and time travelers have contributed to the shelves of Martha Trust...

We wonder. Much Lust! - Team Martha

Black Jesus!

Hey folks, here's an unusual wall accessory from Martha's frame boxes:

Yup, there he was. Everyone's favourite unconventional representation of Jesus, just sitting there for 30p! Surrounded by scenes from his life and set in a fine gold frame, this guy is totally rocking out on the mantelpiece.

I did a little research and supposedly beliefs that Jesus was black stem from a description of him in the Book of Daniel where his hair is said to be: "Like pure wool". Clear proof then that Jesus totally had dreads and was therefore black fo sho.

According to one website, Jesus was even a bit of a pot-head cum drug dealer, freely distributing cannabis oil amongst the sick and needy, whilst being frequently anointed in the stuff himself... Oh sure. Well anyhoo, this masterfully painted image claims to illustrates the stark truth:

There are also lots of alternative races of Jesus, some even more far fetched... Here's hoping these show up in Martha Trust soon!:

Chinese Jesus:

Indian Jesus:

And even Native American Jesus!:

Until next time! Much lust - Team Martha

Vintage Glamour

I had the craving to get some headscarves yesterday, so where else would I go but Martha! It had some lovely ones for 50p. I wore one today in a cute bow, with some Pearl cluster earrings, also from Martha.

Black and white patterned headscarf - Martha Trust, 50p
Pear Cluster earrings - Martha trust, 50p
Faux fur jacket- Martha trust, £3
Top underneath (red) - Primark

A bargain of an outfit really

Toby Parker's Martha Lusts

Toby Parker got in touch via our Facebook group, and sent us some pictures of himself in fine Martha gear!

Here he is in a much beloved Bomber Jacket from Martha Trust:

And here, pictured in Liverpool Lime St, sporting a most excellent striped jacket. We love this!

Remember to send us pictures of yourself in Martha Lust gear to: marthalust@gmail.com or get in touch on the Facebook group.

Much Lust - Team Martha

Music Review: Great Sex mix tape.

We've recently started plundering Martha's cassette tape section in the hopes of finding obscure wonders. Our best find so far has been this glorious mix tape:

We've been listening to these 20 sensual grooves a lot at college lately, it's been instrumental to our artistic motivations. With such great tracks as "I Want to Sex You Up" and "Slow Hand", who couldn't love it? I'm pretty sure every song has a Sax solo.

It does leave you wondering does anyone really make love to this stuff though? Have you ever tucked your partner in to the sound of "'Bump N' Grind'? Did anyone ever hear 'Sexual Healing' blasting from their parent's bedroom at night? Probably not. (or I hope not anyway)

Actually from the looks of things, I'm guessing 'Imagination' definitely get it on to their own songs...

Much Lust! - Team Martha

Wear with Attitude

I found such a pretty top last week in Martha. I saw it a few times before finally deciding to buy it, mainly because its pink, and i never really wear pink. I finally bought it. Its pretty but understated, and a nice very pale pink that looks cool with some attitude. Fishnets and army boots do the job pretty well and i think it looks pretty awesome. Get your fishnets from primark, for a pound a pair it doesn't matter if you rip them up abit.
Pale pink knitted top - Martha trust £2
Skirt - Love label
Tights - Primark
Army boots - Second hand, gift

Oscar De Winterview (Part 2)

Oscar De Winter returns for the other half of his interview!

Lust: What's the weirdest thing you've come across in Martha Trust, your item of Martha Crust?

Oscar: I have very little time for anything other than the 1p reliquary. It is the only pilgrimage I deem worthy of significant veneration. You can keep your 10p tea cups or 20p coffee maker, if it’s not 1p then to me it is devoid of meaning. This does of course mean that I resign myself to half-burnt candles, Happy Meal toys, and things that definitely shouldn’t have been in proximity to plasticine at one point, but invariably have ended up with just a little bit of the wonderclay encrusted about their fabrics. Best item of Martha Crust for me has to be, for sheer confusion upon seeing it, a small piece of crochet in a pale lemon wool. I can’t even begin to describe it, so I’ll have to allow the photo to do the talking. 

Oscar: It’s got a ring in the middle, but it isn’t a scrunchie. It’s got a couple of layers, so it’s not a doilyesque coaster. It’s entirely impractical for any sensible purpose and aesthetically it is utterly devoid of any pleasing value. Artistic merit is equally poor. It’s almost infuriating how unnecessary the thing is. When something serves no purpose, is it worth existing at all? Questions like this are the reason that the 1p box is the true wonder of Martha Trust. No other charity shop causes
you to leave with an ontological debate on your hands. 

Lust: What would be the Holy Grail of finds for you in Martha? What do you hope to spot poking out from behind an old foot bath?

Oscar: A second-hand truss. I’m going on an “If you can think of it, Martha will have it” theory, and so a second-hand truss would pretty much make my day. Failing that, some politically incorrect porcelain figurines never fail to catch my eye, the more offensive the better. Also, I’d really love to see what passes for taxidermy at Martha Trust.

Lust: Man, so would we...

Catch you soon Oscar! Much Lust - Team Martha.

You can find more about Oscar De Winter in his family album: http://oscardewinter.blogspot.com/

Sinderella

Amongst Martha Trust's limited, but intriguing video and DVD section are such forgotten marvels as Julius Caesar in cartoon and an array of unknown action movies starring Shaq... However, we found Jim Davidson's 'Sinderella' with a capital SIN! An apparently "sell-out" adult pantomime from 1995. The raunchy, dirty and somewhat un-p.c content certainly lives up to the seedy aesthetics of its photocopied cover and yellowed DVD with the title written on in felt tip...

It quickly becomes clear that Jim Davidson and his cast, including an almost certainly drunk Charlie Drake, are making it up as they go along, with little regard for the script (if they ever read it in the first place). In fact we're pretty sure most of the cast are completely wrecked, whilst the audience according to the box are "in tears" allegedly of laughter... Including transvestite sisters, a horse with a giant penis and a prince with half a lob-on, this is the funniest pantomime ever to be forgotten.

Until next time - Much Lust - Team Martha (article by Dean)

Slouchy jumper

I really love slouchy jumpers at the moment, and i found this great one on Marthas 50p rail. I teamed it with some Jeggings, my awesome new American boots and a tusk necklace i picked up in a house clearance.

Jumper - Martha Trust 50p
Jeggings - H&M
Boots - Second hand, Ebay
necklace - second hand, house clearance

The Dinosaur

Here's a real masterpiece of human craftsmanship, a wonderful find in the 30p toy basket this week:

The careful paint job deserves much plaudit. With his big eyes and wonky jaw, he is an outstanding example of our prehistoric friends. Such a fine specimen should really be in a far grander location than Martha Trust surely? Say the Natural History Museum?

But really now. There was actually some debate as to weather he was manufactured, or if he was made by a 3 year old from a mould it and paint it yourself kit? I would be certain it was the latter, if it didn't say 'Made in China' on it, and appeared to be made of proper plastic... Someone help me explain his face?

Just think happy thoughts! Much Lust - Martha